Wonder when they were going to tell me??

I went into the church office this morning to get something off my desk and all my stuff was gone. "Hmmmmm" I thought, "that is odd, where did my stuff go?" Turns out they moved it all into the children's directors office - guess they were going to share that information in the morning when I came in. I guess they still want me to take the job too!

Then I went into the service - front of the bulletin says there's a special called business meeting on the 27th to finalize hiring me for the position. Hmmm, wonder when they were planning on telling me about that one too!! Our plane arrives on the 26th pretty late at night - guess we're going to have to be sure and be up for church on the 27th.

I'm starting to feel kind of anxious about the job. Mostly because I have NO idea what is expected of me. I feel like I'm being thrown to the wolves - all the parents are expecting some thing, the staff seems to be expecting some thing, my family is expecting some thing, and I'm expecting something - and none of us seem to be expecting the same things!! I just keep holding onto the fact that God does not call you to do anything without also equipping you to do it. I feel VERY ill equipped at this point - might be God's way of reminding me to continue to rely on Him.

I also learned that the preschool director went to the pastor and told him she'd take the job - hmmm! We've talked about things we were going to do so it's odd that she kind of tried to get the job out from under me. The only thing I can figure is that two of the Sunday School teachers were talking to me at a Pampered Chef party I went to the other night. The preschool director happened to come into the conversation when I was asking them what they wanted for Sundays' etc. Well the one says kind of jokingly "we want her back!" Well they liked the way she did things so they were just saying they wanted things back the way they were when she did Sunday School. But I don't think they were saying they didn't want me to do it - I hope not anyway.

I'm kind of feeling the stress of taking over a position of somebody who was much loved and nobody wanted to leave. I don't want to take her place and I'll never be her! She was young and single and energetic when she had the job - it'll be different with me. I guess I'm getting a small taste of what a pastor must go through when coming in to pastor a new church. This was only the first Sunday she was gone so I know we're all going to need to adjust - me, the kids, the teachers, the church.

I got a small taste of being at church and being on staff too - it's not the same. It's weird to feel so much responsibility rather than just getting to come and enjoy the service. I'm getting a whole new appreciation for all kinds of things taking on this job!

I guess I need to spend more time on my knees giving this all over to Him. I'm also asking Him for a supernatural love for these kids that they'll feel from me - especially for a couple of them that might be a little harder to love! ;-)